Malarum Ninaivugalum

Wednesday, October 11, 2023

Monday, May 29, 2023

Friday, May 26, 2023

Snow - Dream

Realistic Dreams 12 March 2023 A dream about snow! ❄️ While it was actually snowing! As usual, I was sleeping all by myself in Red Bedroom (the love for the color RED never fades, lol). Little bit longer than usual. I was trying to catch up the Zzzzzs that I had lost during the weekdays. It’s Sunday, nothing pressing to rise early to attend to! Actually…this year, the weather was bit crazy! There was absolutely No Snow! I mean Zero Snow Year (even during peak winter). And, more over it was early Spring! The lawn had already turned green. Some of our Neighbors had already started mowing and all. The Bradford have bloomed in full swing! Daffodils 🌼 is just dazzling everywhere. So, there is absolutely no feelings of snow! But, however, the weather kept freezing 🥶 now and then. I went to bed(last night) with usual thoughts! Nothing strange had happened or anything! (Thankfully, lol). It must be almost morning! It’s a weird dream in English. Since, I grew up in India…most of my dreams are still kind of happen in Tamil (my mother tongue). Although, however..,I occasionally dream in English as well ( now and then, but it’s not that frequent). Of course…I live here! It’s almost two decades am out of my native land. All my conversations happen in English with locals (Americans); so it’s not uncommon!! Anyway… The dream unfurls like this: (though I don’t remember much of it, just the snow part is so very vivid). I am in a house. Kind of close/similar to paternal grandpa’s home, with open mutram (open space without a ceiling in middle of the large living area…quite old fashioned style in tropical homes, where the sun shines 365 days). I was playing with a girl (she could be my daughter , but I don’t have a feeling that she is mine in that dream, though). It’s started snowing - flurries, in fact to be specific…we kept trying to catch on & blow. A few minutes of flurries….slowly turned into a thick heavy snow ❄️ balls. It’s so realistically a touch and feel kind of snow. ( relatively - 5 snow balls together made into one). These were kind of thick robe (heavy white ropes…cut into snow chucks) falling off from sky. I cupped a few and smashed to feel the texture…it falls like powered white snow ❄️ Suddenly…my daughter….shook me off from my sleep. “Mommy Mommy, wake up, it’s snowing”! “Come on wake up…it’s snowing…in Spring”. “Can you believe it?” I woke up like “WHAT?” Did I actually dream what had just happened! A strange feeling sets in. There is no snow alerts or whatsoever in our app, this time. It was super crazy. I didn’t feel chilly or anything…to sense the snow, in this controlled atmosphere! Lol. I said to my daughter immediately, I had a snow ❄️ dream. She said…your body felt and sensed the actual snow outside. That’s so nice. ☺️

Sunday, March 12, 2023

What will you do if your Mommy asks for hair clips?

What will you do, if your Mommy asks for Hair Clips? I was sleeping in my Red (my favorite Red Mattress Bedroom, all by myself, alone. It’s normal and usual! I prefer to sleep alone after an exhausting day! I mean which is everyday!! So,…I was in deep sleep (early hours of the morning, maybe 3 or 4) My Mom walked into my room. (Back story: she passed away 10 years ago; and, even before that…she was bedridden for 10 long years, without the ability to walk, talk or even to recognize self or anyone of us). It’s pitch dark. She walked towards my feet, pulled the red mattress off, and rubbed my feet…especially my toes, I guess! So very realistic! I felt it was so REAL. My feet tingled with chillness. And, I swear, I felt the touch! Then, she literally (or at least to me) crawled on to the bed to my right side(the empty side of the King Bed) and lay next to me, for 3-5 minutes maybe. And, turned towards me. As though she wants to talk. I heard her voice saying “I too want that hair clip”. That’s all. That’s all she spoke. She vanished! It was so vivid and clear. Very audible and realistic to my knowledge! I suddenly felt…Mom is not alive anymore to have this conversation! I woke up from my dream/sleep, feeling all awful! Now, rephrasing and cohering her words: “I Too Want That Hair Clip”. Only like 10-15 days ago (prior to this dream), I was impatiently browsing for the Pearl HairClips for Kushi (my 8 year old little girl). I was trying to get one of a kind! Although…there was only a few options at that time! Just bought a bunch of those. (for the time being) While..I planned on making/ordering a custom made one pretty soon! Anyway… Hmmm,I don’t know much about science behind the dreams nor life after death! But, I do know my Mom. And, it’s quite very much like her. Lol. Guess, what I did that morning. I was replaying the dream again and again: those little words especially!Kind of non-stop…over and over again, a million times is no exaggeration! Just to hold-on to Not To Forget (something that happened so-real). While…brushing…showering…and so on! Right after done with my morning routine, cook, clean…drop off at school etc. I have gotten ready and rushing to my office ( the time that you forget everything except for the traffic that you need to beat that day) Lol. My office is like 45 minutes drive in crazy hours! ) The moment I grabbed my bag! The memory of dream came and hit me so strong! Am this usual two minutes prayer kind of person. A flower, candle or even one incense, that’s my daily! Nothing so religious or so or What’s so ever! But, however…today (that day) I felt compelled to go upstairs for a silent prayer (despite of all overwhelmed thoughts). A meaningful prayer: Thanked her for this beautiful conversation after a long time. I gave Mommy what she asked for. The hair clips. The hair-clips that I bought for my daughter. I was so pleased to lay the clips in front of her (photo) than the usual flowers from our garden! And, said…I always loved her.